The Models of the Families

This week’s assignment was about the families and their relationships. It was a very enlightening topic because we explored more about the dynamics of a family and how we can discover or realize what our role in our family is.

 We started by studying different Family System Theories. In simple words, a theory is an explanation based on propositions that are logical about a phenomenon. We studied the following theories about family: the systems theory, the symbolic interaction theory, the exchange theory, and the conflict theory. Each of these explained, in their own ways and measurements, how the interaction between humans in families have consequences based on different perceptions.

Since I don’t want to make this blog super long, I will not explain each theory in detail but instead, I will make a short overview of the concepts.

First, we have the Systems Theory, which explains that families need to be analyze as a whole since each individual influence others. Even more important is the fact that within the system there are some subsystems or relations between each member of the family (parent-children, spouses, etc.). These subsystems have an impact on family behavior and need to be looked at closely.

The next one is the Exchange Theory. This concept was relatively simply since it is basic costs-rewards idea. We have costs such as money, time, emotional or intellectual energy or whatever we define as an “investment” and then we have rewards such as emotional or intellectual gratification, money, protection, sense of belonging, or whatever we define as a “satisfying outcome”. We weigh the pros and cons and determine if the relation is appealing or fair.

An interesting twist in the Exchange Theory is the Symbolic Interaction Theory, which explains that the definition of the situation is what changes our behavior. This basically gives our perspective of the world a heavier role in how we interact with others. Depending on how we view the reality, we might be satisfied with a relationship that others perceive as undesirable or bad (wife staying with an abusive husband because that way her kids can have a dad).

Lastly, Conflict Theory states that there is always going be inequality, conflict and change as we struggle over a scarce resource. That is explained in families like the power struggle between spouses to control money, authority or status.

This are some general ideas from the theories but aside from them, a concept I learned along with the material this week was Feedback. This is a complex process when it is applied to families. Basically, it is how the family members respond to the behavior of another person in the family. This is especially interesting to notice when an individual in the family deviate from an existing pattern of interaction. That means that the person’s actions change to something good or better, receiving Positive Feedback, or something bad or worse than its normal state obtaining a Negative Feedback. In each case, said feedback has a purpose, either encourage more of the same change or to try to restore the individual and the system to a steady state.

In my case, I can now notice how this works by remembering a time in my life when I first went to high school. So far, I had been an excellent straight A student, but the combination of friends and other ideas in my mind, made me want to fail all my classes and try to save them by taking the extraordinary test for each at the end of the semester. I knew I was going to do good in the test, but my parents did not take this action as a personal challenge like I did. They instead started to worry about my health, the possibility of me using drugs and some other extreme scenarios.
From this experience I learned that my role in the family as the oldest had a powerful impact on everyone else. My siblings were confused about the situation, wondering if they were “allowed” to do the same. My parents were horrified for the abrupt change and after I told them my reasoning, there were obviously repercussions for it.

Families are a complex and amazing structure and the most important unit of society. Understanding how our family interact with each other and what our role is in the same can be extremely beneficial.